


Something to die for

by sadwidow



Category: South Park
Genre: F/M, K2 - Freeform, M/M, Multi, a little blood because yknow, but not anything serious, but they have some moments, cartmanxwendy the same amount as staig, crenny more like brotp, drugs and alcohol, i suck at describing drugs effects and shit, ive never done any drugs, not really any gore, probably other ships as well, so might be some mistakes, theres no creek sorry, theres staig though
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-06
Updated: 2019-07-21
Packaged: 2020-02-27 10:46:04
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 6
Words: 13,570
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18737470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sadwidow/pseuds/sadwidow
Summary: - Kenny likes Kyle a lot so when Kyle accidentally kills someone, Kenny is willing to help him avoid the consequences.- Wendy and Cartman are trying to forgive each other while Wendy's having problems with Stan and their relationship.- Craig wants to win a bet while proving Stan's not as straight as he seems and claims to be.(also, English is not my first language and the story will concentrate on K2)





	1. Cartman got my yogurt killed

**Author's Note:**

> English is not my first language so in case of any mistakes pls inform me and also I hope you'll like it :)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The beginning of the disaster.

_**Otis English - Trigger** _

_All I have and all I am is burned to the ground wi_ _th my own hands.  
_ _I let you come around a_ _nd make your mess._  
_My hands on the trigger, we're back here again._  
_Half myself, half undone, years rundown on the run._  
_I feel I'm sinking down e_ _very step.  
My hands on the trigger, taste on my breath._  
_Same old rage outs, cutthroat times out._  
_Took what's left and I gave in._  
_I fell for the trigger and laid in my bed._

 

There was no living soul that hated love more than Kenny. He wasn’t fond of science, although he knew a thing or two about chemical reactions and hormones. Both of those had a huge impact on the brain, manipulating your actions and emotions. A sneaky, devilish thing, that love was. If people studied it more thorough, it wouldn’t be so romanticized and fake advertised with overly sweet decorations.

In other words, Kenny was mad, but the love wasn’t sufficient reason any longer. No, he was frustrated with himself and with the way he couldn’t stop looking at Kyle’s emerald eyes, shining with a greenish light. He wouldn’t be opposed to the possible prospect of doing that for the rest of his life, all day and every day. He searched everywhere for that same fiery temper, fierce personality and violent passion, but no one matched the description. 

Kyle was talking with Stan about something, Kenny didn’t really care what the conversation was about. 

“You’re drooling, McCormick.”

Craig joined the gang at the table in the cafeteria, smirking at the sight of Kenny’s dreamy expression. The blonde scoffed at his friend but smiled involuntarily. Kenny’s feelings were a secret and the only person possessing that worthless knowledge was Craig. Craig read him like an open book because he of all people knew a thing or two about repressed love. 

Kenny wondered how much longer he would be trapped in his own mind, considering the miserable state has been present since middle school. Kenny hadn’t been even aware of his feelings back then but thanks to Craig who stepped one day, expressing his compassion for the unfortunate unrequited love, everything has become clear and more complicated at the same time.

“I’ve been drooling for a few years,” he said jokingly, but the bitterness could be heard in his voice. “A little more and I’ll die from dehydration.”

Stan gasped loudly and Kyle said something along with the words ‘I know, right?’. Both of them were too occupied with the conversation to notice Craig’s arrival and his gaze lingering on Stan for a short amount of time. It wasn’t a hating look, nor a friendly one, instead, it consisted of curiosity and wonder. Craig still hasn’t gotten over his grudge when it came to the gang, with Kenny being an exception. After the breakup with Tweek, Kenny and Craig had started talking more and more, discovering how similar they actually were but McCormick’s friends were something entirely different. Although recently, Stan has become kind of attractive and Craig started to get more interested in knowing him.

“Not the first and not the last time,” chuckled Craig and got busy with the gruel. Miraculously, food in the cafeteria has become more disgusting and repulsive than in elementary school. Apparently, they hated the teenagers more than kids which was understandable. 

Kenny groaned at the memory of a few unpleasant days full of agony by dehydration. It was traumatic, but after that, the curse of no one remembering his multiple deaths had passed. That was the only relief he could get, apparently.

“What are you doing here? You can’t sit with us,” hissed Cartman after he had loudly put the tray full of food on the table. Stan and Kyle flinched at the sudden noise from the outside. Kenny rose an eyebrow at Cartman and shifted his gaze to Craig, who just leaned back in his seat and smiled mockingly. “Don’t you have your own friends? You know, Tony, Clint and Twerk?”

Kenny snorted with laughter but quickly covered the mouth with his hand. The joke was lame, but his standards were low. Craig folded his arms over the chest with an amusement visible on his face and waited for the follow-up because he couldn’t believe Cartman would leave the insult with such a bad joke.

But surprisingly, he did. Eric groaned, murmured something under his breath and forced himself in between Kenny and Stan. 

Everyone at the table got silent, giving Cartman anxious looks. Eric pretended not to notice anything and instead, he got busy with tampering with the food.

“Oh my god, I can’t believe it,” spoke up Kyle and Cartman looked up at him, annoyed. “You’re finally dying. After all these years…”

“Yes, yes, shut the fuck up,” interrupted Cartman, stabbing the plate with the fork. “I’m tired, Kyle. Your Jewish origins protect you from any kind of work but life isn’t so easy for everyone.”

“And what do you do exactly?” joined Kenny before Kyle started a war. Don't get him wrong, he loved seeing Cartman's ass getting kicked (especially by Kyle) but Eric doing something in secret was always extra spectacular. 

“Nevermind the shell, focus on what’s inside,” answered Cartman, putting some food into his mouth. He chewed for a few seconds, then spoke up again. “So, guys, I heard some of your parents are away and I was planning on getting high. No, Kenny, because I’ll catch a venereal disease,” Eric added when he noticed Kenny opening his mouth to articulate some words. McCormick gave Cartman a cold stare and punched him in the stomach, causing Eric to spit the food that was previously in his mouth. Craig laughed and got back to eating; that was usually what he did when hanging out with Stan's squad or what he called them: the Gay Squad (with Cartman and Stan disagreeing, Kyle and Kenny not giving a fuck). There were times when Cartman wasn't an annoying asshole but today was not that day.

“You’re fucking psycho, dude!” Eric growled at Kenny, giving him a look full of reproach. Kenny leaned back in his seat and scoffed, but couldn’t escape his curiosity with Cartman’s ideas. Kyle would get a bad feeling every time something connected to his fat nemesis appeared and this day wasn’t any different. Broflovski frowned and Stan just sighed deeply, tired by his friends’ shenanigans. “Kaaahl? I was thinking about your house.”

“Because?” Kyle knew he would regret it later. He didn’t even need to hear the whole idea.

“No reason, just because,” answered Cartman casually with his gaze impaling the food. It couldn’t get more suspicious than that and in every other situation, Kyle could just ignore the offer and it would die by default. But he didn’t.

McCormick tried to get Eric to talk but the boy was as persistent as ever. Being too occupied with Cartman, he didn't notice the worried look Kyle was giving him. He liked seeing Kenny happy, despite the horrible fact that Cartman was causing his excitement. Nevertheless, he wanted to keep him in that state as long as it was possible considering it has been a while since the last time he was interested in something other than work and taking care of his sister.

Although they weren’t as close as they used to be (due to Craig’s presence), Kyle had the compassion born into him. He hoped Tucker was a good friend, but one could never know for sure. 

“Fine, I guess it’s just some weed,” groaned Kyle as he let out a deep sigh. Cartman smiled under his nose but after Kyle’s next words, he was outraged. “But I’ll invite others. And you have to get weed for all of them. For free.”

“What?! Do you want me to go bankrupt?!” Cartman banged his fist on the table, causing everyone to jump in surprise. Everyone except Craig who looked at his tray and sighed sadly, whispering to himself: _Oh nooo, my yogurt._ __  
“In that case, fuck off,” snapped Kyle, ramming his fork into the table. Cartman scoffed but backed down from fighting. Stan rolled his eyes, wondering when he could eat his lunch in peace. Kenny’s let out a quiet purr, thinking about sucking Kyle’s dick all day long just to hear him swear.

“Fine then, you leave me no choice, Kahl.”

“And buy him some yogurt.”

“There are some limits, Kahl.”

“You’re right. And how did you know my parents are away?”

***

“You are a fucking snitch, you know that?”

Kyle barged into Ike’s room. Ike had heard his quick and angry steps even before the intrusion so he remained calm and unbothered by his brother’s boldness and lack of culture. 

“Are you listening to me?!”

“I’m reading,” spoke up Ike, letting out a deep sigh. Kyle scoffed, approaching his brother and whipping the book off Ike’s hands. Younger Broflovski didn’t even react, recognizing his mother’s temper and knowing it would be better to just shut up. He always waited out their bursts of anger and was getting used to that. “What do you want?”

“For you to admit that you’re a snitch,” growled Kyle, his face all red and eyes full with anger that was slowly vanishing. Ike rose an eyebrow and sighed.

“Cartman paid me. Our parents are gone because of me, you dummy.”

Kyle didn’t know what to say, considering the shock that was written all over his face. Ike reached out his arm, clearly wanting to get his book back. Kyle scoffed at his brother, dropping the volume on the floor and then coming out of the bedroom before he slammed the door closed. Ike wasn’t impressed.

Kyle sat on the couch, still impacted by the adrenaline running through his veins. He turn on the TV and before he could busy himself with some stupid programme, someone knocked on the door. Kyle groaned and felt his frustration coming back. Broflovski hated his temper inherited from his Jersey-Jewish mother, a mix of two things that created the worst possible combo. Sometimes he couldn’t stop himself.

He stood up with a grunt in order to greet an uninvited guest. It was violent and angry but when he saw who visited him, he softened. Kenny. The only person he just couldn’t get mad at, no matter how bad he wanted. Kyle knew it had something to do with Kenny’s material and financial situation.

“Kenny?”

“Yo, I just wanted to help you with the party!”

Lie.

“We have a lot of time until the party. I’ll manage.”

“Come on, dude! Let’s spend some time together, it’s been a while!”

Kyle noticed bruises and a trail of fresh wounds on Kenny’s neck despite him trying to hid them from Broflovski’s sight. He frowned but didn’t comment on the visible marks of abuse.

“Fine.” Kyle stepped aside for Kenny to get in. McCormick breathed a quiet sigh of relief, trying not to look nervous. “Are you hungry?” asked Kyle but he knew what Kenny would answer so he headed towards the kitchen almost immediately.

“Nah, I’ll manage,” said Kenny and followed his friend. Kyle rolled his eyes, wondering why he had to be so proud all the time. The crying sound from Kenny’s stomach only confirmed Broflovski’s assumptions. “You seem angry.”

“Well, yeah, because my brother is a little shit. He sold me out to Cartman. I need to speak with fatass about involving Ike in any of his stupid ideas.”

“Ike’s smart. Don’t worry,” commented Kenny, causing Kyle to sigh. As much as Broflovski hated that he was betrayed, he had to admit that he was proud of his little brother. Doing things Kyle would never do and making profits out of it, it was admirable but why did it have to be Cartman? “Although if it was Karen, well…” Kenny would kill Eric if he ever involved Karen in any of his little shenanigans, Kyle wasn't so much a brute. He preferred destroying Cartman mentally. 

“Here, eat it. And I don’t want to hear excuses,” spoke up Kyle after a few minutes of silence, putting a plate on the table. A warm meal was an enjoyable change, considering the usual reheated lasagna. Kenny wasn't aware of the fact that he was drooling at the sight and Kyle pretended he didn't see it.

***

Grocery stores were full during late Friday afternoon, mainly because of the weekend hiding behind the corner. Kyle and Kenny were squeezing through the crowd with difficulty, ramming people with the huge shopping cart. Kenny almost immediately dragged Broflovski to the alcohol alley and Kyle agreed to come, unwillingly. The selection of needed food products meant for the high and hungry started, consisting of frozen pizzas and snacks. When Kenny was looking through the fridges full of ice-cream, Kyle noticed a strange man who has been watching him for a few minutes. He frowned and looked away when Kenny decided the flavor of ice-cream he wanted to go with. At the cash register, he saw the man again.

“Someone is watching me,” murmured Broflovski, tugging at Kenny’s parka. McCormick looked at him in surprise and looked around but saw no one. “Maybe I imagined it,” decided Kyle, not convinced about that statement when Kenny told him about his observations.

***

“Pardon my french, but what the fuck?” Kenny couldn’t believe his own ears. He wasn’t drunk nor he was high so he couldn't put the blame on his intoxicated state. He hoped Craig was joking or saying it because of his senses and logical thinking going numb. However, Tucker was just smiling, apparently very content of the statement and him in general. 

“I said Stan has a great ass, nothing more,” said Craig in an attempt of defense and Kenny just snorted. Yes, because going from 'I hate that fucking douche' to 'He has a great ass' wasn't an indication that something else was on Craig's mind (other than that great ass).

“Do you think I am a fucking idiot?”

“I don’t think you’re an idiot, I know it. And besides, a man has his needs and it’s been some time since the break up with Tweek.” Craig shrugged and took a sip of his vodka drink. He cringed at the bad proportions. “And shouldn’t you be supporting me, you so-called-second-rate-of-a-friend?”

“I just want to save you from disappointment, dude,” sighed Kenny, massaging the bridge of his nose. “Stan is straight and by that, I mean not just straight. He couldn't be any more straight than he is already."

“You wanna bet?” asked Craig. He loved to be right and he knew Kenny was a sucker for bets and the prices that came with them. He often lost because Craig wasn't a type that would take risks. When he bet, he knew he would win and he always did. "Give me a week."

“Fine,” groaned Kenny and they shook each others’ hands. “What’s the price?”

“A blowjob.”

“I don’t recognize you, you fucking whore.”

***

Kyle has never been a fan of drugs but Bebe was this kind of person that you just couldn’t say no to, whatever race, gender, age, social status you were. Her presence and influence resulted in a passionate debate with Wendy about turtles’ rights in Eastern Europe. At some point during the party he felt sick and decided to go to the bathroom. 

When he was about to go downstairs and continue being high, he heard a noise. The loud and clear sound coming from his bedroom. He stopped, turned around towards the room and opened the door, most interested.

In the dark, he saw a human figure, fumbling in his drawer full of underwear. Kyle froze, terrified by the situation and insobriety of his mind. The burglar didn’t pay enough attention or even noticed him, probably because of the loud music coming from downstairs. Kyle with his shaking hand took out a knife that he carried with him at all times in order to defend himself. Logical thinking was muffled while his survival instincts were still working. There was only one thought: it’s either him or me.

The man turned around and froze when seeing Kyle. The burglar looked at the knife and rose his hands as a sign of surrender. Broflovski saw the man’s lips move but he couldn’t make out the words coming out of stranger’s mouth. He was too focused on holding the knife with both of his hands to understand everything else. The man started to move towards him, probably with a purpose to take away the weapon. At first, he was doing it slowly but suddenly decided to move more rapidly.

Kyle extended his arms with the knife as a reaction to such an abrupt change of movement. The man didn’t notice the rolled-up part of the carpet and tripped, impaling himself on the weapon held by Kyle. The knife pierced through the carotid artery which caused a quick blood loss over to high pressure of the blood vessel. Kyle stared into wide-open, slowly losing its glow, light blue eyes.

Blue eyes. Who had blue eyes? Kenny. Kenny had those eyes.

And suddenly, the strange man began to look like his friend. Kyle fell on the floor along with the body. He took Kenny in his arms, ran his fingers through the blond hair and smiled painfully. He would never hear his voice, stupid jokes and sweet words. He would never see sky-blue eyes that had been looking at him so often and with so much warmth in them. 

He started to whisper apologies. The tears flowed down in the abundant stream, bitter and full of pain. He decided to sit like that until they would pull him away from the body.

***

Kenny had decided to keep himself sober. There was no shortage of parties to have fun at and he wanted to show Kyle at least once in his life that he could restrain himself from doing drugs or drinking alcohol. Also, he had planned to keep his eye on Broflovski who suddenly disappeared from his field of vision. He asked people if someone maybe had seen his redhead love and then went upstairs. First, he noticed the half-open door to Kyle’s room and then heard him sobbing loudly.


	2. Cartman's an asshole

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kenny is feeling alone, Kyle's having panic attacks and Cartman is being himself.

**SYML - WDWGILY**

_ I've made a grave mistake.   
True love miscalculated.   
My nightmare turns to day   
I can still feel you in my space.   
Keep it all locked tight   
In the middle of the night   
Think I'm doing this right.   
It wasn't my fault   
I called out (This is too much)   
I've had enough. _

 

His first instinct was to run but instead, he remained in his position with eyes fixated on the body. It was like a dream where nothing felt right or even remotely real. He experienced death too many times and felt the accompanying pain with every ripped limb but this was a strange phenomenon for him. 

The world slowed down and left him vulnerable, the distant sounds of crying reached his eardrums. Kenny watched Kyle with a blurry understanding of the situation, not being able to speak or move in any way. He had so many questions in mind that petrified his ability to think clearly. 

“Kyle…”

It was quiet and throaty, articulated with much difficulty. At first, Kyle didn’t react, his mind bombarded by thousands of chaotic thoughts and panic. Kenny repeated, this time louder and softer as if trying to make sure he won’t scare him away.

Kyle turned around slowly, his eyes wide open and his face covered in fear caused by the appearance of the witness of his crime. The first thing he saw was an orange parka and the corpse slumped over to the floor as Kyle loosened his grip. The tears started to run down his cheeks but he wasn’t even aware of that, too busy with comprehending the view before him. 

_ He wasn’t dead. He didn’t kill him. He didn’t lose him. _

Kenny used the delay in Kyle’s reaction to come closer, although it was slow and careful, similar to approaching a wild, injured animal. He kneeled before him trying to calculate the situation. Kyle was absent-minded, with tears in his eyes and looking blankly at the orange parka figure. Kenny caressed Kyle’s cheek with his fingertips, the touch almost non-existent, but still enough to cause a reaction. Kyle flinched and for a moment Kenny thought he lost him, but he heard his own name said almost inaudible.

Kenny smiled and Kyle just let out a breath of relief. He embraced the blonde in a tight, needy hug as if to make sure he didn’t imagine the person before him. He wasn’t crazy. He  _ couldn’t be _ crazy.

Finally, they broke the hug. Kyle was visibly better and more stable than before as if he forgot about the bloody sight behind him while Kenny couldn’t think of anything else.

“Kyle?” started Kenny in a sore voice, trying not to activate any of Kyle’s triggers. “What did you do?”

Kyle turned pale at the question, reminded of his crime. He closed his mouth tightly into one line while his eyes started looking around the room with no purpose, radiating chaotic energy instead. He giggled suddenly and Kenny flinched at that unexpected reaction.

“Okay, calm down, we can…”

“I didn’t want to! It just happened so fast! You have to fucking believe me!”

Kenny quickly put his hand on Kyle’s mouth and shushed him. Their eyes met and Kyle was glad that out of all his friends, Kenny was the one standing at his side in such a tragic situation. At that moment, he felt safe.

But Kenny didn’t. Maybe Kyle chose to ignore the sadness in blonde’s eyes or maybe he just genuinely didn’t notice the desperation. That kind of desperation that screamed ‘ _ help me’ _ .

And Kenny lost himself. Kyle looked at him in a way that was strange, yet familiar and never in his life had he been so close to telling him. Telling him how perfect and smart he was. Confessing how much he meant to him and how hard he loved...

“Thanks, I think I’m still on drugs.” 

...his soul.

Kyle let out a deep sigh, closing his eyes for a moment. He wasn't even aware of the interruption in Kenny's thoughts.

_ This was never going to happen. _

Kenny looked down at the corpse, thinking that maybe it wasn’t worth all the risk. He could run away from his love and the murder.  But when he shifted his gaze to Kyle, he was reminded that before he fell for him, he was his friend. And just for that reason, he couldn’t leave him now. 

“Fuck, fuck, fuck! What am I supposed to do now?! I’m gonna rot in prison. I’ve ruined my life!”

“You just need to calm down, Kyle. Just… breathe and we… we will figure something out” he said but a wave of doubts fell over him. A corpse with the knife sticking out of its neck, a pool of blood and red stains all over a room screamed with intensity. 

“He was watching me.”

Kenny didn’t react, he just looked at his friend with empty eyes and waited for the continuation. 

“In the supermarket.”

Kenny looked at the corpse and nodded, not having anything specific on the mind. He just… performed a reaction. Maybe he should say or do something; anything, for that matter, but he didn’t. 

Kyle expected something, at least. He wasn't a murderer and he needed Kenny to know that.

The rambling of thoughts was interrupted by heavy steps and both of them recognized the person going upstairs as Cartman. The least wanted individual in any situation that was troubling, especially in their case that was a matter of life and death. 

Kenny quickly got out of the room and closed the door behind him. He just waited for the inevitable consequences and there it was, fat and with a hostile attitude. 

“Oh. Hey, dude, what are you doing here?” Cartman asked after noticing his friend. Kenny tried to play it cool so he just shrugged and hid his face in the parka. 

“Checking on Kyle”.

For a moment, Cartman looked uneasy as if something bothered him but he quickly changed his expression to the usual poker face. Kenny didn’t see it though, too occupied by staring into the floor.

“Kyle’s sick? Did he finally catch a venereal disease?” Cartman scoffed but gave McCormick a hoping glance. Kenny rolled his eyes and wished it was, in fact, a venereal disease, not an act of murder.

“And you are here because?”

“Because fuck you and it’s none of your business” answered Cartman casually, heading towards Ike’s room. He knocked, got permission to come inside and after giving Kenny a look, he went inside and close the door behind him.

Kenny breathed out deeply, leaning against the wall. He just needed to get through this Cartman situation and… and then what? What would he do?

He counted the passing minutes...or maybe hours, for a moment the reality got a bit blurry.

Finally, the door opened and Cartman walked out. He glanced in the direction of Kyle's room but didn't say anything. Instead, he closed the door and approached Kenny.

"So like, what's wrong with him?"

Kenny looked up at Cartman, wondering what kind of sick plan appeared in his twisted mind.

"He just got sick. He's fine."

But Cartman wasn't easy to fool, considering he was the master of lies and deception.

"So, does he need anything?" 

Kenny repeated Cartman's words in his mind just to make sure he heard him right. 

"Uhm… yeah, actually."

"So go and I'll wait here just in case."

Cartman expected some kind of reaction but Kenny just stood there with his gaze impaling Eric. Behind his eyes, there was a coldness and Cartman knew that look all too well.

"I was thinking you could go and bring something."

"Nah, I don't really know what he needs."

Cartman was perfectly aware that Kenny could beat him up without a sweat; that's why he chose that kind of battle he could actually win.

"I will tell you what he needs."

"Nah. I'll pass."

And Kenny knew that. It would be stupid to use force on him when there was not really any need for that, although the image of seeing the pain on Cartman's face was tempting. Would it work? Maybe. Was it a good idea? Maybe. Did he want to do it? Of course.

"I really think you should go."

"I will take care of Kyle, don't you worry."

"That's what I'm worried about." 

Too occupied with the discussion, they didn't hear footsteps coming upstairs. Before they could even comprehend the presence of another human being, they heard a voice.

"Hey, guys. What are you doing here?"

Stan asked with a little smile, completely oblivious to the tense atmosphere between two of his friends.

"Kyle's feeling a  little under the weather, apparently," Cartman said casually, deciding to make the first move. Kenny gave him a cold stare, slowly shifting his gaze to Stan.

Marsh looked at McCormick expectantly and Kenny just nodded in agreement.

"Well, what happened?"

"Drugs and alcohol are not a great combination, Stanley, so he just needs to rest."

"Let me see him and maybe I can help," said Stan, moving towards the door. Kenny quickly prevented him from grabbing the handle.

Marsh was visibly surprised at such reaction and for a moment he didn't know what should he do. He just frowned and waited for the explanation while Cartman studied Kenny’s face for anything that could give him the answer he needed.

“He asked me to take care of him because all of you fuckers are fucked up,” said jokingly Kenny. He hoped it would be enough.

“I’m sober enough, I think I can handle him.”

“Yeah, well, I’m more familiar with drugs than any of you are so…”

“Fine, whatever, let me just see him and I’m on my way.”

The strength that Stan possessed was extraordinary due to his football career so Kenny was easily moved out of the way. The door now was unprotected and McCormick felt his heart beating faster with his lungs hardly handling the breathing.

“Don’t come in, Stan!” Kyle shouted from behind the door. Marsh was confused but stopped his further movement. Kenny looked like he was about to faint and Cartman just stood there with a vague face expression. 

“Are you okay? Do you need anything?”

“No, I’m fine. Kenny’s looking after me. Just don’t come in, I puked and I look like shit and just I don’t feel like seeing anyone, sorry!”

The time stopped for a moment. Kenny was impressed by Kyle's quick change of attitude but at the same time, it felt wrong as if he should be more unstable. Meanwhile, Broflovski was strategizing which meant he had listened to the conversation happening on the other side of the door. Stan sighed and stepped away from the door. Kenny felt his lungs working again and the relief fell on him despite being an accomplice of the alleged murder.

“Wait, you’re gonna leave it just like that?” Cartman wasn’t angry nor manipulated by his emotions and everyone that knew him since his childhood knew it wasn't a good sign. Kenny hoped Stan could get rid of Cartman which he fortunately did because Eric respected Marsh in some strange way Kenny couldn't understand. 

“Just fuck off, Cartman. Don’t be an annoying asshole and leave them” Stan sighed, massaging the bridge of his nose. Eric scoffed at that behavior before leaving and disappearing at the stairs.

But Stan remained in his position 

Kenny smiled awkwardly at Stan, but his friend didn't intend to leave just yet. He looked like he was about to say something but gave up eventually. 

“Hey, you know, Craig’s not that bad,” Stan said as if he felt obliged to start a conversation. If Kenny heard those words in any other situation, he would be the most interested person in the whole wide universe but at that moment he was just annoyed. “We talked a little and he’s actually a funny guy. Never thought he was.”

_ Because he isn’t, he’s just trying to get in your pants _ , Kenny thought with a bashful amusement but bit his tongue and kept himself from saying anything. He didn't want to encourage further conversation.

“Oh yeah, I almost forgot. He invited me to some bar, calling it a ‘boys night out’, saying you would be there. Are you coming? I wanted to invite Kyle too.”

“Of course I’m coming!” Kenny said a bit too eager, though Stan didn’t look like he minded it and he just smiled in his usual way. Sometimes Marsh looked so innocent that Kenny would forget about his alcohol problem and selfish behaviors that probably should see a therapist.

“Great. Look after him, would you?”

“You know it, dude.”

Stan left and Kenny hesitated, the thought of asking Marsh for help occurred in his mind but he quickly abandoned that idea. Kenny took a deep breath and grabbed the handle, then entered the room with fear of what was to come.

Kyle seemed rather calm than scared and of course, it wasn’t a bad thing. Kenny didn’t have to deal with panic attacks but it just felt wrong. 

“I’m going to take a shower. Do you have a plan?” asked Kyle when Kenny leaned against the door with a relief visible on his face. McCormick sighed and shrugged, massaging the bridge of his nose. “We’ll think about it in a few minutes. You know you don’t have to help me.”

“I know.”

***

The shower seemed like a good idea at first but the stream of hot water didn’t soothe his nerves. The mind was racing and despite the silence around him, Kyle could hear whispers in the distance. Who was talking to him? What was said? Why was this happening?

Kyle hated it. His own uselessness to manage. He acted like a tough guy, never bothered by anything, always calm and stoic. He thought he had a solution to everything. But in reality, he was just a rich kid that had no real problems. Nothing to worry about, except the grades, prom and his friends’ drama. 

Until now. And even then, he wasn’t alone.

He could ask Stan for help. He wouldn’t be betrayed by him and Kyle knew that but dragging another person into this wasn’t fair. But maybe it was the right thing to do. Kenny had it rough already.

He cursed loudly, trying to force those thoughts out of his head. It was exhausting. Has Kenny been living his life like that? Constantly on the edge, fearing he couldn’t make it. Everything he did was for Karen, never for himself. He had nothing to his name.

***

“They’re coming back tomorrow. And then they leave on Friday again”.

Kyle’s words felt weird, interrupting deadly silence. Both of them were sitting on the floor, leaning against the wall and staring at the corpse as if it was a normal view for them. No emotions, just actions. The room smelled like shit in a literal way. The pylorus had loosened up and the feces were pushed out. They had already tested that theory in elementary school so it wasn’t a big surprise. 

“We gotta relocate the body and clean the room first but also, we have to keep it somewhere for the time being” started Kenny, having taken a deep breath. Kyle nodded, absent-minded. “We have to do it quickly, the blood is still fresh. When it comes to the body, well, I have an idea but it’s risky.”

“Everything about this situation is risky, so go ahead.”

“I was thinking… maybe we could bury it in your yard or something? Until we find another solution and clean the room,” Kenny added quickly when seeing Kyle’s unamused expression. Broflovski shook his head and clicked his tongue as a sign of disagreement. “Then after your parents would be away, we could move the body somewhere outside the town and deal with it.”

“It’s not bad, but I’m not a fan of burying it. It takes a lot of work and time and we don’t have that. Not to mention digging it out afterward.”

Kenny sighed, closing his eyes. He was trying so hard not to snap at him for disagreeing with every single thing he said and not coming up with any solutions himself. Kenny knew he shouldn’t be mad, but he couldn’t stop the feeling, fuelled by the tiredness and frustration. Kyle didn’t speak much and seemed as if didn’t appreciate the help. Kenny felt more and more lonely with every passing minute.

“What do you suggest?” Kenny asked after a few minutes.

“I was thinking about the basement but we don’t have one. The same problem with the attic."

"Yeah, well, that's why I didn't suggest it," Kenny growled, not looking at his friend. Kyle glared at him, surprised and taken aback. It was odd seeing Kenny annoyed and maybe he should have tried a different approach to his behavior, but Kyle wasn't exactly thinking straight.

"What is that supposed to mean?" he asked in anger and Kenny just groaned out of frustration.

"I'm trying to come up with something while you should be doing it instead. I want to help, not to do everything myself. Just give me a break and suggest a solution or something, I don't know!" Kenny let out a heavy sigh and hid his face in his palms. The work was killing him and between doing that and taking care of Karen, he tried to maintain good grades. Kenny hasn't given up on his future yet, but it was hard. The rest of them didn't need to do shit and that angered him. He was trying but nothing ever seemed to go his way.

"I've told you not to intervene! Don't blame me for your decisions!"

"Do you really want me gone?"

Kyle was silent at first, taken aback by the way the words were said to him. With such profound emotion he couldn’t quite identify, not at that moment at least. His pride restrained his ability to admit that he needed help and his own helplessness wouldn’t let him manage in any way.

"I guess so."

"Have it your way.”

Kenny stood up, sensing the strength leaving his body. He felt so weak at that moment and he hated the feeling of vulnerability. He looked at Kyle and instantly regretted having done that. The hesitation fell over him but he couldn’t sacrifice himself all the time.

So he left.

Kenny leaned back again the wall and sat on the ground, clutching at his head. He cursed himself in his mind, trying not to cry. He couldn’t go back, otherwise he would be trapped there forever. But wasn’t that selfish?

An asshole. A bad friend. A horrible person. That’s who he was. No wonder no one has ever loved him. Kyle could do so much better with literally anyone else. He hasn't ever succeeded in anything and just felt like a joke. Why was he born? Just a waste of time and space.

So he came back to Kyle. Just to do something meaningful. Just to feel needed. Apparently, Kenny would never learn how to respect himself.

“I’m so glad you’re back!” Kyle let out a sigh of relief and ran his fingers through the hair. Kenny smiled weakly, locking the door behind him. He felt empty. 

"Yeah, but you didn't go after me."

"I'm sorry. Sometimes I'm too proud to show that I need people. I appreciate your help, believe me. I just don't know what to do. I'm panicking."

Kenny didn't believe him. He decided not to get too attached and hurt himself along the way. They just had to get rid of the body and do the cleaning, then after that, Kenny would avoid Kyle as often as possible. He wanted a break and knowing someone you're deeply in love with didn't feel the same, sucked. 

"We can do this, Kyle, but I need you on my side."

"I am on your side."

"Let's do it then."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I got pretty sad when writing the Kenny part because I love him so much and I just want the happy ending for him in general and I hate myself now XD  
> Please let me know if you liked it, maybe something I should work on, any feedback is welcome


	3. Cartman's a human

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Craig is flirting with Stan, Wendy is disappointed and talks with Cartman while the killing boys are done with the clean-up.

_**Cage The Elephant - Cold Cold Cold** _

_Sweet nurse, don't look at me that way,  
I've seen those eyes before, I can tell you want to play.  
Counselor, give me some advice,  
Tell me how hard will I fall if I live a double life._

Craig was annoyed. The parties weren’t his thing, mostly because of loud people and general structure of those events and yet there he was, sitting on the couch and staring at the phone screen. Everything was Kenny’s fault and his stupid idea to come.

Craig wanted his best friend to be happy and finally reunite with his other half, of course, but that didn’t mean he should suffer if it wasn’t absolutely necessary. Especially when the only person that he could stand at the moment was the one that wasn’t here, meaning Kenny. The break up with Tweek wasn’t the most pleasant thing in the world and they decided to stay out of each other’s way. He hasn’t spoken to Clyde or Token in a year or so because of that and the bond weakened, letting them drift apart. It was completely unnecessary though, seeing as they also didn’t have any closer relationship with Tweek at the moment. The whole gang was in pieces. Sometimes Craig would wonder if it was his fault or maybe it was just destined to happen.

“Well, that’s a bummer,” said Stan, having sat on the couch next to Tucker. Craig didn’t find it interesting enough to ask about more details or any details, for that matter, but Marsh wasn’t easily discouraged. “I hoped I could have fun with Kenny because you know, he works non-stop but I guess he’s too busy with Kyle.”

“Too busy?” Craig looked up, giving Stan a suggesting look, but he was as oblivious as ever. Sometimes Tucker wondered how in the hell that one brain cell of his kept Wendy at his side for such a long time. 

“Nah, not in that way,” Stan answered quickly and laughed nervously, scratching the back of his neck. Craig rose one of his eyebrows, but didn’t say another word and got back to scrolling the feed. “So I guess the only way to get you interested in the conversation is to start a sexual topic, huh?”

“You said it, not me,” responded Craig, as unimpressed as always. Stan hummed at that answer, wondering if he should continue the conversation. He liked Craig for some unknown reason that was hidden deep in his mind and he couldn’t quite figure out where it had come from. 

“Why?”

“Oh, are we doing this? We’re gonna talk right now?”

Craig gave Stan a doubtful look and Marsh just shrugged, not expecting such a sudden reaction. Usually, he wouldn’t really respond to anything that was said to him so the conversation ended.

“The sexual topics usually are very interesting and they come with the drama. It’s fun to watch people get awkward and flustered. And there is always something to talk about after and well, I need something in my incredibly boring life. I think you too. So, are you happy with that?”

“Well, that answer was more than I bargained for, that’s for sure. Since we’re talking and you’re not completely ignoring me… why are you sitting here alone? It’s a party.”

Despite knowing the answer, Stan still asked the question. He couldn’t think of any other topic at the moment and he wanted the conversation to last. And yes, he might have just annoyed Craig but he didn’t leave him yet so maybe it wasn’t that bad of an idea.

“As you may know, I hate people. And parties. And social events. And my life.”

“So why did you come?”

“Because of Kenny. I think he’s the main reason for everything that I’ve recently done. He’s busy so I wanted to spend time with him, my best friend.”

“Best friend? Dude, no offense, I just think he treats Kyle as his best friend.”

Craig tried to hide the visible amusement, but he just couldn’t help it. The look on Stan’s face made it impossible to take the statement seriously, despite the gravity in Marsh’s voice. That little dork actually thought that Kenny initiating that huge amount of physical contact with Kyle was purely friendship. So cute of him.

“You really think that’s the case?”

“Yeah! And you don’t?” Stan was getting defensive and annoyed at Craig’s smugness so Tucker decided not to express his opinion. He had to admit that sometimes he was an arrogant bastard but, to be fair, most of the time he was right about things. But now, he just smiled and Stan was taken aback. Craig Tucker  _ didn’t _ smile. What was happening that night? “Okay, well, obviously we have different opinions and that’s fine. So what, are you gonna sit here all night?” asked Stan after breaking the eye contact. He felt uncomfortable being so close to that soft side of Craig. 

“Maybe.”

“So you might as well drink or do drugs.”

Craig just rose an eyebrow out of amusement and a smug grin appeared on his face. Stan seeing his reaction just shrugged and scratched the back of his neck, unsure about what to do next. Why did he feel that way? Nothing out of the ordinary was happening.

“Are you demoralizing me? I thought you were a good boy.”

“Well, listen, I’m kinda bored,” started Stan with a sigh, trying to ignore the part that was obviously full of sexual meaning. “And we’re kinda friends, right?” Stan looked at Craig for some words of affirmation or a little nod of the agreement at least, but Tucker just glared at him. “Right! So let’s have some fun. We need to know each other better since you’re in our gang now. What do you say?” Stan opened his arms as an invitation in a dramatic way and Craig couldn’t help but laugh a little. Even if he didn’t screw him, he would be content with this kind of relationship. Of course, that didn’t mean Tucker was going to give up and leave him alone.

“I don’t do drugs but we can get drunk,” Craig said with a light sigh and put his phone back in the pocket of his jeans. Stan smiled like a kid getting his Christmas present and Tucker wanted to suck his cock right at that moment. “I can be a little… off, you know. But you’re straight so that shouldn’t be a problem. Am I right?”

“Ehm… and what are you asking about?”

“Are you straight?”

“I guess so.”

“You guess so?”

“What? Oh, fuck, yeah! Of course I am. That was a stupid question.”

“I don’t think it was ‘cause I had to ask you twice and you still don’t sound convinced to me.”

“I am straight, don’t worry. But like why would you ask that?”

“I’m gay, Stan. I might be a little horny or flirty or something like that and if we were both gay and wanted to stay friends then we would have to be careful. But with you? No problem, right? You won’t be tempted or anything.”

Craig stood up with a grunt and looked around. Clyde and Token were smoking and laughing their asses off in the corner of the room, while Tweek had a passionate conversation with Butters near the kitchen. He frowned, for a moment getting stuck in his thoughts. 

“Well, now I’m interested.” Stan smiled with joy and stood up, following his friend. Both of them went towards the kitchen.

“That was the point.”

“What?"

“What? Nothing. Let’s drink!”

***

They decided to relocate the body through the living-room despite the risks that followed the idea. Kyle suggested using the trash bags that were stored somewhere in the house and Kenny agreed. 

“Can you check if Cartman’s still there? It’d be better if he didn’t see us.”

“Why can’t you?”

Kyle sounded defensive for some reason and suddenly Kenny felt extremely annoyed. He looked up, trying not to snap at his friend and gave him a cold glare.

“I need to take a shower and change clothes just to be safe. Now please, go.”

Kyle left without another word, feeling the guilt eating him alive and despite that, he still couldn’t admit to making a mistake. His hands were shaky but overall, he looked decent. Kyle tried to focus on his task which was to find trash bags, spot Cartman and evacuate back to his bloody room.

He headed to the kitchen first, trying to avoid any social interactions. He just hoped no drunk and/or high person would target him as their new fun partner. He saw Clyde lying on the floor near the couch and mumbling something with Token next to him, sketching lines and circles. He passed by Tweek and Butters when going into the kitchen and then sunk down to the cabinet. Too occupied by the search, he didn’t notice Stan who was looking at him strangely.

“You feelin’ better?”

Kyle jumped in surprise, hitting his head on the counter. He hissed out of pain and cursed under his breath, slowly standing up with a roll of trash bags in his hand. He smiled awkwardly and articulated a weird, lingering greeting. Kyle hated Stan’s timing. He tried to come up with some convincing way of escape but when he noticed Craig beside Stan, he just frowned and forgot all about his mission.

Tucker was leaning against Marsh comfortably with the arm around Stan’s shoulder and neither of them was bothered by it. The whole picture was giving Kyle some weird vibes and he wasn’t sure he liked it. Craig wasn’t friendly. Not even to Kenny.

Something was wrong.

“And what are you doing?”

“Nice to see you as well, Kyle,” sighed Craig and took a sip of his beer. Kyle was a loss for words for a moment, but he quickly gathered his thoughts back.

“Don’t you hate each other?” asked Kyle while giving Tucker a glare full of visible discontent. Craig was like a sculpture, not even one muscle of his face twitched. There were a lot of reasons for Kyle’s unwillingness to become Craig’s friend and he just found another one to add to the list.

“We’re not in elementary school, dude,” said Stan with a small chuckle and Kyle hated that with his whole body, mostly because Craig just smirked at the statement. If not for the text Kenny sent him, Broflovski would definitely start a fight. Or at least an argument, he wasn’t the type to beat someone.

“Okay, whatever,” Kyle growled and quickly escaped, with two pairs of eyes following him. Leaving them was not the best idea he came up with but there were more important things than Stan’s love life. He just wished Marsh would be more responsible and not confined in Kyle that much.

Meanwhile, Stan stood there with an open mouth and a hundred unspoken words. Craig patted him on the back and smiled warmly, suggesting they should continue drinking. Stan never understood Kyle’s moods so he decided to let it go once more. It was a party, after all.

***

Kenny sighed and massaged the bridge of his nose while trying to come to terms with reality. Corpse. Living-room full of teenagers. The love of his life. Horrible. They used two trash bags, tied them and surprisingly, it didn’t even look like a dead person. Well, maybe to the sober ones it would look suspicious but the teens downstairs weren’t exactly in their right minds or so they hoped. 

“So Cartman’s gone?”

“Uhm, yeah, I guess so.”

“You guess so?”

“Stan surprised me and also there was fucking Craig and I just lost myself for a moment,” Kyle quickly explained, looking like a kicked puppy. He added a quiet apology when seeing Kenny’s tired expression but the latter didn’t have enough strength to be angry or even slightly annoyed. He just sighed and avoided staring into those big, green eyes and at disheveled hair that just made Kyle look like the cutest creature in the world. 

Kenny refused to speak his mind which was common but nevertheless, it infuriated Kyle. He loved the communication and expressed feelings while keeping everything clear and simple but it was always different with the blond boy. He was so closed in his own world and secretive with burning insides that it was almost impossible to get through that wall he had built over the years. No matter how much Kyle wanted to get close, it seemed like he was always too far away. 

“I think we should start with the clean-up. We can move the body later, maybe most of them will be home by the time we finish” suggested Kyle after a moment, admitting to himself he wasn’t as much of help as he wanted to be. Kenny nodded, the wrinkles on his face softened and the frown disappeared.

They decided to throw away the carpet permanently since it was all covered in blood and way too problematic to wash. Kyle organized a bucket full of warm water and some soap to get rid of stains on the walls and furniture. The blood on the floor wasn’t as visible.

After an hour or so, they were done. They wrapped the body in the carpet and hoped no one would ask inconvenient questions but seeing as almost everyone was in a state of unconsciousness, it was not likely. Despite that, Kenny still checked every room and obtained additional information about Cartman. Turned out, he had left the party in a hurry and in a bad mood so the major obstacle was removed. A small stain on the floor was still bothering Kenny since they had to use the bleach on the whole surface of the bedroom, but Kyle told him not to worry for a time being.

Slowly, they went downstairs. The corpse was heavy with the additional weight of the carpet but somehow they managed to carry it into the garden, probably the adrenaline had its influence on the sudden strength. No one had stopped them or questioned their actions. 

They placed the body behind the large bush at the back of the yard. Kyle explained that no one really went there and no neighbors could see the body from their windows. Kenny decided to trust him and both of them got back into the house.

“You need to soak your clothes in the solution of hydrogen peroxide or use the lemon juice and then just wash it as you would do in a normal situation,” murmured Kenny when they arrived in the kitchen. Kyle nodded and before he could say anything in response, he heard Stan’s loud voice, followed by Craig’s.

“Hoooow you feeelinn’ Kyleeee?”

“Stan, don’t you fucking trip on me.”

***

**Earlier**

***

"Are you drunk?" asked Wendy since she couldn't believe her own eyes. There was no anger in her voice, only weak disappointment. He had promised her he wouldn't drink and yet there they were, having the same conversation as always. Stan shrugged at her question while Craig just got busy with his phone. "Can you answer me?"

"Baaaaaabe, just this time! One timeeee!" Stan stood up, almost falling over to the ground. Wendy didn't move, she just watched her dearest boyfriend in disbelief as he put his arm around her shoulder. She cringed when smelling the alcohol coming from Stan's mouth. "Joinn uuus, it's gonna be fine and great baby Craig is so much funnn! And then we can go and do something else," he whispered theatrically and giggled like an immature boy he was. Wendy pushed him away, resulting in Marsh falling on the couch next to Craig.

"Have fun, Stan. I'm going home," she said in a weak voice, grabbed her coat and stormed out of the house. No one really paid any attention, being busy with flying dragons or vomiting in the corner of the room. Craig massaged the bridge of his nose and sighed deeply.

"She's nooo fuun, right?!"

"Yeah" he answered, almost whispering.

***

Wendy loved Stan. They have known each other for a long time and despite the issues in elementary school, they still chose to be together. Wendy was scared of being alone and maybe that was the reason for her endless acceptance of Stan's every behavior. Sometimes she wondered if she really loved him or maybe she was just used to him in a way that made them friends more than lovers. She didn't crave any sexual encounters but she couldn't disappoint Stan and his needs. Wendy had a choice, of course, and she knew Marsh would accept her decision without hesitation but the fear she felt was petrifying. Opening to another person, explaining the problems she had and trusting them to understand; no, it was too much.

Too occupied by her thoughts, she didn't even notice stopping near Cartman's house. There had been a weird time in middle school before dating Stan when she would go to Eric with most of her issues. Why? She had no idea but remembered the kind of problems Cartman had been dealing with at the time. He was a sociopath but deep down she knew he had a heart. Yes, it was dark and disfigured, but it existed. Both of them decided not to mention their brief relationship and just go their own way.

"The fuck you're doing here?" She would recognize his annoying voice everywhere.

Wendy looked up and there he was, resting on the windowsill with an unreadable expression on his face. She sighed heavily and averted her eyes from him, wondering why her body led her to his house. Wendy was just about to leave when Cartman spoke again. "You want to come in?"

She froze and looked up at him with suspicion in her eyes. Eric waited patiently for the answer.

"Why?"

"Just because."

She got silent, surprised by that sudden offer. She used to love talking to him. He was a remarkably good listener and his intelligence often impressed her. The conversation had never been boring. 

Wendy missed having someone she could confide in. She missed the spiritual connection.

Eventually, Cartman got bored of waiting and disappeared from her field of vision. She thought maybe he changed his mind but after a few seconds, the door was unlocked and he invited her to come inside with a wave of his hand. Wendy hesitated for a short time, but in the end, she followed him into his house.

"Where's Stan?"

"Drunk and having fun."

"I thought he wasn't supposed to drink," he said while closing the door. Wendy let out a quiet sigh but didn't say anything. She followed Eric to the kitchen and sat at the table while Cartman was going through the fridge. "I have some beers if you want."

"What kind of beers?"

"Somersby."

"Oh, then yeah, I'd like one."

Cartman took out two bottles of beer and joined Wendy at the table. Both of them opened them with the use of the edge of the table with the bottle caps landing on the ground, neither of them bothered by the fact. They drank the beers quietly with Wendy breaking the silence after a few seconds.

"I didn't know you still drink those," she said with a nostalgic smile, looking at the bottle rather than at him. Cartman leaned back in his seat, scratching his neck.

"Yeah, well... some things never change."

It was rare to see Cartman so calm and peaceful, enjoying himself. Despite shared emotions, she could never comprehend his feelings fully and vice versa but it was just a human thing.

"Why did you left the party?"

"I got mad, mostly with Kenny," he answered, taking a sip of his beer. He couldn't look at her for some reason and sometimes she wondered why.

"Were you being an asshole?"

"Like always."

Wendy smirked, almost forgetting how much soft and true he was at times. Maybe if he was easier to be around...

"Did that surprise you? I guess you don't know me at all," he said in a harsh voice and took another sip of the beer. She shifted her gaze and looked at the table with a sad smile."I choose to be an asshole, I just don't want to admit that to those fuckers."

Before Wendy could say anything, the ringing sound interrupted their conversation. Cartman quickly grabbed the phone from his pocket and looked at the phone screen. He frowned and answered while Wendy waited and watched him.

"Can you pick up your fucking phone?! Do you think it's some kind of joke?! What do I pay you for?!" Cartman was furious and sometimes it terrified her. "Wait, what? Are you sure? Did you check? Shit!" Eric slammed his phone on the table and tried to calm down, looking at Wendy from the corner on his eye. She was slowly drinking her beer, looking around the room as if trying to spot something familiar. He wanted her to stay.

"What is it?"

"I gotta go for a few minutes but if you'll wait for me…"

"No, I think I'll go home," she said quietly and Cartman bit his lip quite painfully. He stood up with a grunt before she could see the sadness in his eyes.

"Maybe you should finish that beer first. Anyway, nice talking to you," he said as a goodbye and stormed out of the house. 

She was now all alone, drinking their favorite beer dating back to middle school and sitting at her former friend's house. It was weird, yet comforting. She quickly finished the beer, left the bottle on the table and got out of the building. She headed home, without any extra stops in mind along the way.

***

"Where's Kyle?" Cartman attacked the first person he stumbled upon. Clyde held his hands as a sign of giving up, squinting his eyes as if trying to recognize the aggressor. Token was just staring at the scene in front of him with eyes wide open, not believing that Barack Obama was attacking his best friend.

"Uh, upstairs?"

Cartman didn't think twice. He went upstairs to Kyle's room but it was empty. He noticed the absence of that ugly yellow carpet and the almost invisible stain on the floor. 

He started searching the bedroom with a clear purpose of what he wanted to find but he didn't. Eric groaned out of frustration and cursed loudly. When hearing Stan's drunk mumbling, he decided to come downstairs.

"Is he drunk?" asked Kyle with a disappointment hearable in his voice. Stan said something as a response but no one could understand him. Craig asked Kenny for help and McCormick quickly obliged. He put Stan's arm around his shoulder and headed toward the chair. They sat him up with a few difficulties which caused Kyle to sigh deeply. "And what are you doing here?" he asked when noticing Cartman standing in the door frame.

"You didn't see anyone, did you?" he asked, trying to find anything that could betray his secret, but Kyle just gave him a questioning look. Kenny, on the other hand, froze and shot Cartman a threatening glare but Eric being too occupied by Broflovski, didn't even notice the sudden change. "Never mind," he sighed, shifting his gaze to drunk Stan which caused him to frown. "Are you drunk?"

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you have any suggestions please let me know in the comments because right now, I'm making things up as I go.  
> BTW, I love Wendy so much, protect her at all costs.  
> Also, surprisingly, I really enjoyed writing Cartman x Wendy moment and I hope you liked it as well!  
> 


	4. Cartman's not that bad

_**The Neighbourhood - Daddy Issues** _

_Go ahead and cry, little boy.  
You know that your daddy did too.  
You know what your mama went through.  
You gotta let it out soon, just let it out._

Kenny hated going back home, although that name wasn’t even mildly accurate. Not even a proper building, being rather a shack, filled with psychological traumas and ruined childhoods haunting the McCormick sibling.

He always hated that place and thought it couldn’t get worse, but since his father’s death, everything has gone downhill. Due to financial issues, Carol found a husband to feed her children and provide any living conditions. And this was the only good thing about the situation. Their father, as crappy as he was, had never abused them physically. Owen was different.

After the party, Kenny went home. He hadn’t even bothered to say goodbye, deciding he has experienced enough for one day. He didn’t want to come back there, to Owen, but where else would he go?

Before he could even walk through the door, Owen spoke.

“Were you fucking with someone?”

Kenny rolled his eyes, slowly closing the door behind him. He had to keep his cool but at the same time, he had to respond because if he didn’t, the situation could get unpleasant very quickly.

“No. Just taking care of my drunk friend.”

“Okay, spare me details, I hate that gay shit.”

“Well, you asked and I didn’t say what gender they were.”

“Watch your mouth, you brat. Now, bring me a beer from the fridge.”

Kenny took his shoes off, although it was unnecessary, considering the constant mess in the house. He was still trying to pretend they were an ordinary family. And so was Owen, in his weird way Kenny couldn’t quite understand.

Kenny went to the kitchen, not even looking at his stepfather. His mother was probably sleeping somewhere, passed out drunk, either in the house or some park. He didn’t care enough to find out.

“Was it good?” Owen asked when Kenny gave him the can. McCormick looked at the man, not knowing how to react. Sometimes his stepfather would behave as if he had a heart and Kenny hated the option that Owen was just a human being. “The party, that is,” Owen added, clearing his throat and trying to get anything as a response. He looked at Kenny expectantly and waited.

“Not too bad, not too great.”

Owen nodded knowingly with his glare landing on Kenny’s neck. His face softened but before McCormick could notice the look in his eyes, Owen shifted his gaze back to TV.

“You should hide the bruises or something,” he said and cleared his throat, opening the can. Kenny studied man’s face as if trying to find any signs of guilt or compassion, but nothing seemed to catch his attention.

“Yeah,” he whispered weakly. How many times in his mind did he plan the route of escape and a new future? He needed to get away and death wasn’t an option for him. Some people had it worse than others.

That guy in the yellow carpet? Lucky he had died.

***

Craig loved going back home, taking a break from people and reading gay fanfiction all day and still, he was at Kyle’s house for some unknown reason with Cartman on his right. Was it guilt? Some weird sudden kindness? Maybe he was still drunk? He wondered, looking at half-conscious Stan.

Yes, Craig knew about Stan’s addiction. Everyone did. And despite that knowledge, he still got him drunk for his amusement. Tweek used to call him an asshole but he didn’t know even the half of it. This was all part of his charm which resulted in the abuse that didn’t seem so obvious at first glance. 

“Maybe I should take him home?” volunteered Craig when Stan’s mumbling became just a mess of words.

“I’ll do it. As much as I hate all of you, including him, I don’t trust you,” Eric said without even a little bit of interest in the conversation. The comment lacked of any amount of venom that was common in Cartman’s way of talking to others and Craig needed a moment to comprehend what he had just heard.

“Shut up, Cartman. I know you don’t mean it.”

“Yeah, yeah, fuck off,” he said softly, being an asshole just for the sake of it. Craig decided to leave him alone and Cartman was glad that he did, considering he felt as if he was drowning in the ocean of old unresolved issues.

Craig sighed and wondered why had he made friends with them in the first place, seeing how problematic and dramatic they were. He said goodbye to both Kyle and Stan and nodded in the direction of Cartman, deciding it wasn’t worth his effort (ignoring the feeling of guilt, still present in his gut).

“I’ll take him home,” said Eric in an absent voice, getting Kyle’s attention. He looked at his hated so-called friend and frowned, giving him a questioning glance. Cartman stood up from the couch with a grunt and approached drunk Stan, ignoring Broflovski’s comments. “I’m doing you a favor so shut up and take it.”

Kyle decided to trust him, being too tired and stressed out with that whole night. Within a few minutes, both of his friends were out of the house. Kyle inhaled deeply and slowly let out a heavy breath.

***

With Ike’s help, he managed to clean out the whole house before their parents’ arrival but he wasn’t ready for their return. Every time someone went out to the garden, he felt sick and scared for his life. Kyle was terrified to such a high point that he was almost guarding the door. He knew he was panicking and that nobody would ever come close to the bush but it didn’t muffle his irrational thoughts that were banging on his skull.

Constant annoying predictions about the future and illogical fears were far too much for his young brain. He couldn’t eat or sleep, being well aware of the huge stain on the floor. Of course, the lack of carpet didn’t escape Sheila’s notice and she asked about the reason behind the action.

“I don’t know, I always hated it.”

His response was as simple and stupid as it possibly could be. He decided he wouldn’t remember half the details of the explanation he would come up with.

“I understand that Kyle, but you didn’t need to throw it away! It was a perfectly fine carpet.”

“I kinda spilled blackcurrant juice on it.”

“Well, that’s a shame,” Sheila sighed and shook her head in disbelief. “Anyway, did you eat?”

Kyle didn’t contact Kenny in any way during the whole weekend and vice versa. Maybe both of them tried to pretend nothing dreadful had happened and maybe they just didn’t want to talk about it. They still needed to do plenty of things to finally get it over with and there were about to be too many occasions to discuss the issue.

Stan’s constant messages about his relationship problems were keeping Kyle’s mind off the stressful situation and he was grateful for that even if it was for a short amount of time. Broflovski was on Wendy’s side and tried to convince Stan about the mistakes he made. Stan didn’t object.

Craig briefly texted with Marsh, asking about his health but the conversation was cut short when Stan started telling him about his relationship problems. Tucker decided he didn’t want to get too deep into Stan’s personal life and develop a relationship. Maybe later, but not now for sure. Craig kept his thoughts to himself and the only person that was about to know was Kenny. But not through texts, Tucker hated that.

Cartman was under the weather and he couldn’t get himself together for the whole weekend. He was constantly in his head, reminiscing and wondering. Cartman thought about texting Wendy, but in the end, he didn’t. Why should he?

When it came to Wendy, she was unbothered by the situation. She has known Stan for such a long time that she understood him better than Marsh himself. Wendy knew he needed some time to become aware of his mistakes, having experienced similar situations before. And probably would keep on doing that in the future over and over again. Sometimes it was comforting; knowing your other half so well you couldn’t go wrong with them. And yet there they were, living in a miserable relationship. 

Wendy didn’t want to admit that and Stan wasn’t aware. They were each other’s anchors and the biggest enemy at the same time. 

Wendy was used to this. She liked the stability and so far, Marsh was the only thing she knew how to handle. She couldn’t be surprised by him or disappointed in a way that she hasn’t experienced before. It was a calming feeling when everything would come falling apart, but also depressing if you thought about it more for than just a few seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's so short but I'm working every day.  
> Also, pls give me some suggestions or ideas for the next chapters <3


	5. Kyle's advice

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More talking about relationships.

Stan’s weekend wasn’t exactly something you think of as fun or even adequate shitty and the beginning of the school week turned out to be even worse. His head was spinning, the mind was haunted by intrusive thoughts he has been trying to shove deep down and he couldn’t really comprehend what was happening around him. 

Texting and complaining through messages had made him even more miserable than before.

_ Why are you doing this to her? _

There it was, the first question he didn’t have an answer for. Stan wasn’t a bad person so why he was doubting himself? The guilt has started when Cartman had had a conversation with him. It was short and messy but it had covered every bad thing he has ever done in his life and during the relationship with Wendy.

_ Do you even love her? _

Of course, he loved her, she was the only one. He always imagined relationships as someone being in the dark, alone and confused with a sudden source of light coming to save them. Stan thought it was poetic, accurate and wholesome with most people agreeing with that perception of love.

_ Why are you with her? _

But recently he wondered if it was the truth. He didn’t need any light because the day was bright enough. The dark was present but he just needed to wait for it to pass and it usually did. That description of love wasn’t right anymore. 

_ Why are you hurting her? _

Was he hurting her?

He couldn’t answer any of those questions so just tried to ignore them for the time being. He noticed Kenny sitting at the desk in an empty classroom which was odd. He usually came to school just in time, but never before any other students. So the day was cursed, not only for Marsh.

“So I’m not the only one, huh?”

Kenny flinched at a familiar voice and turned his head. He had been deep down in thought for some time and it was obvious when looking at his face but Stan was either oblivious to the fact or just tried to pretend nothing happened. 

McCormick didn’t answer Stan’s question and watched Marsh making himself comfortable in the seat next to him. He wanted to interrogate him and ask about what had happened with Wendy or Craig or anyone else but at the same time, he was too tired and busy with his own shit to care. 

“It’s rare to see you this early in class,” said Stan, trying to get a response. 

“Likewise” he spoke up in a voice deprived of any greater emotions.

“Actually, you’re wrong. I’m always this early.”

“Good for you.”

“Why are you this early?” Stan asked after a couple of seconds of silence. Kenny sighed heavily and massaged the bridge of his nose, wondering why couldn’t he meet someone less nosy and annoying. Of course, Stan was better than Cartman.

“I don’t know,” he said in a tired voice. “It just happened.”

“Hard weekend?”

Kenny groaned, frustrated that Stan couldn’t understand his bad mood. 

“Listen, I know I didn’t answer any of your texts but it wasn’t just you. I didn’t feel like talking to anyone and I’m sorry about it. If you’re hurt or something.”

“No, dude. I’m okay.” Stan smiled embarrassed and leaned in his chair. After a few minutes of silence and thinking, Marsh spoke up again. “Can I ask you a question?” Kenny sighed and closed his eyes but murmured something familiar to ‘yes’. “Do you think I should be with Wendy?”

Kenny quickly turned his head towards Stan and frowned out of surprise. He opened his mouth to say something, but stopped almost immediately and studied Stan’s face instead, trying to find anything that could help him answer. He wondered if it was some kind of test of friendship and maybe there was only one right response to such a difficult question.

“I don’t know. I think you should know. Do you love her?” Kenny knew he was walking on thin ice and tried to be as neutral and unbiased as he possibly could. Stan sighed, obviously not happy with the answer.

“Oh, you’re both here.”

Cartman entered the classroom with a vague expression on his face, giving Stan a cold glare. He took his usual seat and started unpacking his stuff on the desk while Marsh watched his actions intently. 

The conversation they had had after the party was blurry and Stan couldn’t remember it well. He wanted to ask Cartman about details and what exactly had been said but he decided to postpone it for later when seeing Eric’s annoyance. He wondered who else was in a fight with the universe on that particular day.

***

Kyle hadn’t had a good sleep in two days so going to school became a challenge he wasn’t sure he could face. Unfortunately, Sheila was merciless and completely oblivious to Kyle’s state of mind. 

To Ike’s dissatisfaction, Kyle decided not to drive to school that day. Since the accident, he has been trying to avoid closed spaces and chose to spend his time outside instead. Ike wasn’t happy about the fact but had nothing to say in the matter. 

In the school’s hall, by the lockers, he saw Wendy. They exchanged glares and for a moment it looked like she wanted to approach him and talk but she didn’t, dropping her gaze instead. In any other situation, Kyle would accept it and be happy since he wasn’t the best person to be around in the morning but some things have changed.

“Hey, how are you feeling?”

Wendy looked surprised when Kyle approached her but she smiled warmly and greeted him quietly.

“It’s okay, I guess. Better than the last two days.”

“Have you talked with Stan?”

Wendy lowered her gaze and smiled sadly, scratching the back of her neck. The deep sigh indicated the negative answer and Kyle understood her train of thought. Stan wasn’t a bad person but he was reckless and stupid. Sometimes he wondered why she was putting up with him in the first place. Wendy was too good for him and the only person that Kyle considered to be right for her was himself. But that wouldn’t ever happen.

“Stan will talk to me when he’s ready. His emotions are… well, you know, he’s sensitive and slow and needs to think things through.”

“How many times, Wendy?” Kyle gave her a tired glare, wanting her to understand his point. She did and he knew it but consistently ignored the truth. That was the main reason for her and Bebe’s recent fights. 

“Every relationship has its problems.”

“I suppose,” said Kyle, preventing himself from yelling and making her understand it’s not healthy and she should know better. But he didn’t because he wasn’t the right person to tell her what to do, not after the accident. “Do you wanna go to class?”

“Yeah, sure. Thanks for caring and talking to me. After the recent fight with Bebe…” Wendy sighed, remembering the bitter words that had been said. Bebe had been too honest and harsh while Wendy had become angry and frustrated at her own helplessness.

“It’s gonna be fine. Every friendship has its problems.”

***

Craig’s feeling of guilt disappeared after the weekend or at least he hoped so. He convinced himself that if Stan cheated on his girlfriend then Stan would be the bad guy because there are many obstacles and temptations destined to be win over by people. Morally, he was in the gray area and he was fine with that. As long as he wasn’t directly involved in any shenanigans. 

“Oh, hey, I should’ve known you’ll be here” Bebe spoke up when she joined Craig behind the school building. Tucker turned his gaze towards her and released a cloud of smoke. He took another drag of a cigarette, sighing quietly at the sight of another human being. His hatred for people reached a peak level in the morning and Bebe was perfectly aware of that. 

Stevens leaned against the wall next to Craig and took out her own pack of cigarettes.

“Can you like… go away?”

“Can you like fuck off? It’s a free country.”

Craig rolled his eyes and decided not to start a fight he would most likely lose. Arguing with Bebe was always a bad idea, considering her skills and lack of mercy for the opponent.

“You know, I’m not here because I want to see you.”

“Really? So to what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Stop hitting on Stan. I’m warning you, Tucker.”

Craig maybe was a sociopath, but Bebe was a bad bitch, ready to sacrifice everything for her best friend’s happiness. Both of them knew with whom they were working with and how much of a bad person the other one was.

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“I’m warning you, Craig. I know what you did in the past.”

“Same to you, Bebe.”

“Great, so you know what I’m capable of. Cutting a bitch wasn’t an issue before.”

The words were said calmly in a cold voice. Every other ordinary person would feel the shivers down their spine but Craig just smiled under his nose and took another drag. 

“It’s so boring nowadays, don’t you think? I wonder why Heidi doesn’t come to school anymore.”

“Yes, I wonder as well.”

Her motto was ‘fake it ‘till you make it”. Pretending she was a nice girl worked almost every time because all of her actions were planned and thought through. She was wearing white gloves and if something bad happened, it was never her fault. Even if they catch you, act as if you know nothing. Only a few people knew her true face and it was terrifying. Maybe in another life, Craig and Bebe could be friends. Maybe

“So do you think they are good for each other?”

“It doesn’t matter but I can’t risk another fight with her just because you men can’t keep it in your pants.”

“Is that why you’re a lesbian?”

“I’m warning you, Craig. Keep. It. In. Your. Pants” she said through the gritted teeth and blew out a cigarette with her foot. She shot Tucker a dangerous glare and left him all alone with his thoughts. 

Craig sighed, massaging the bridge of his nose and smiling devilishly. He hated orders and Bebe should have known better. Now he was certain he would do anything to separate Wendy and Stan, thanks to Bebe. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know it's short but again, I'm working. The next one should be longer.


	6. not  a chapter just info

the next chapter should be at the end of August due to my job and other stuff, for now I'm editing old chapters and a few things will be changed. I'll inform you about them in notes in the next chapter


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